MacGregor Alf 2

The rabbit is taunting me. It's taken to turning up on the lawn first thing in the morning or early evening. I spot it from the upstairs window and race down to the kitchen. It's still there. TFD hasn't noticed it even though he is now looking out the window. I consider only briefly how useless he is whilst acknowledging that at least he hasn't scared the rabbit away.

I slip my shoes on. Now, if I can just slip the bolts and dash out I can see where he goes. TFD and I burst from the kitchen, the rabbit hops, as usual, into the side border and...disappears. I charge through the small gate in the fence at the top of the lawn that separates the modest vegetable from the main lawn (and TFD). No, still no sign of the rabbit. It must have slipped through the inner fence and then squeezed between the slats of the outer one. There is just too much vegetation to be able to see where it goes from the lawn.

Deflated, I trudge back in. Mrs Alf is watching from an upper window, her face a picture of mirth. TFD may be useless, but his utter ineptness at chasing the rabbit is proving to more entertaining than I would have thought.

Rabbit returns

The rabbit is back. There he was, bold as brass, sitting on the lawn when I noticed him through the French windows. As soon as I moved to open the doors he hopped off into the border, but I went out anyway in the vain hope I would spot where he was entering the garden.

TFD ran around dementedly chasing a scent. I finally called him over when it was clear he hadn't a clue what he was doing and pointed to the actual direction the rabbit went. Fat lot of use he is. The only risk the rabbit runs of being caught by TFD is being humped to death.

I managed to break the lawnmower the other night. It's a cylinder mower and I failed to spot a large chalk stone (yes, I know it was white but there were a lot of white rose petals lying around that had been blown off in the recent wind and rain). The blades stopped with a depressing clunk and the cylinder failed to re-engage so I presume the clutch is history. So not only an expensive repair to look forward but no doubt a wait of several weeks to get it fixed at this time of year.

The only bright side is that the rabbit hasn't eaten my carrots. Yet.

Cider review

After much abuse from the Bushmeister with regard to my taste in cheese and beer (amongst many things), and permitting imported lager to foul the threshold of my fridge, his sanctimonious ire turned to my recent penchant for cider.

So, in the interest of research, I acquired a couple of Bushmeister-approved "quality ciders" to compare with the bottled Bulmer's which I had reported as being highly drinkable and dismissed by the Bushmeister as industrial effluent.

The results:

1) Bulmer's - refreshing when chilled, fairly smooth and tasty.

2) Aspall's Dry Suffolk Cyder -pale in colour, slightly carbonated, good flavour and not too dry. (And only £1.59 in Tesco's at present.)

3) Henry Winston's Vintage Cider - a strong, robust flavour. Highly recommended. (A stonking £1.26 in Tesco's. Although, at 8.2% ABV, I'd be like Goaty Steve on his second shandy after a couple of pints of these.)

And just to keep this post in context I have 2 fine blisters on my fingertips from moving the ironing board the other night. Top Alf Tip: try to pick up only the ironing board and not the hot iron sat on the end of it.

Still, it was my own fault for doing women's work. He said out of earshot of Mrs Alf.